Board Thread:Off Topic/@comment-26877467-20161017175134/@comment-26631534-20161019223348

A 42,420,133,721 picometer wide, 100-ish-pound red  ball made of gold with rapidly flashing blue stripes perpendicular to each other with a white glow coming out of a rounded square hole on the rear end which is emitting a rainbow trail made up of mostly red, orange, yellow, a very light green colour, a very light blue colour, another shade of blue, a very odd purple, and yet another purple, with each being at an equal amount and parallel to each other while the colors are congruent in width, but also being about 1% gray. The  ball rolls at nearly 25 mph and turns 97 degrees counterclockwise every approximately 24 seconds during the summer. Every 12-ish seconds, a stream of fire is released from the rounded square hole. The fire is purple, with a pinkish glow and grey tint, and it extends nearly two feet out from the hole. The fire burns at -40 degrees Fahrenheit. The  ball identifies itself as an apache helicopter, which is likely due to its extremely rare cerebral condition, corcoranophilia, a side effect of a disease caused by a very obscure scientific reference. The  ball also smells like cream cheese opened for 5 days, 2 hours, 19 minutes, and 7 seconds and emits waves at such approximately rounded of a 25 gHz frequency every two approximatated seconds. In addition, the  ball contains a colourless, glowing 14 sided yellow dodecahexahedron with an area of about 10 minisculously invisible metricisions.